Sexual Assault on Campus: Protecting Your College Kid
Campus sexual assault statistics (an under-reported epidemic)
There are a multitude of things to consider when preparing a teenager for the adventure of college. There will be new teachers, new friends, new atmosphere, new rules (or lack thereof) and all of it will be navigated by the young person who grew up under the loving care of your parental devotion.
Even when the first semester begins, there are still items on the to-do list or things left behind while packing that you as a parent will make sure to send off so your college student has everything they need to make the year a success. With all that there is to think about, pay for and respond to, it’s easy to neglect an issue that is becoming increasingly urgent for college freshman. An issue that many parents feel ill-equipped to address: their child’s sexual safety. Many parents I’ve talked to would rather do all their neighbors’ laundry for a week than tackle that conversation.
In the midst of a global pandemic, we run the risk of overlooking or minimizing other human “ills” that have plagued us far longer than Covid-19. Like the epidemic of sexual assault, a problem that has not decreased in intensity regardless of social distancing requirements. In fact, the ACLU estimates that 95% of rapes on college campuses go unreported, and a recent study conducted in 2019 found that the rate of non-consensual sexual contact by physical force increased from 2015 to 2019 by 3.0 percentage points (to 26.4 percent) for undergraduate women.
Clearly, we have a long way to go in understanding and responding to the variables that contribute to campus sexual assault. Among others, these include: “the red zone” (the time between the start of school and Thanksgiving break when 50% of assaults against college freshman are estimated to take place); confusion about consent; alcohol use; and peer pressure. By understanding these variables, we can begin to have more effective conversations about prevention that meet young people where they are at and provide them with tools for how to respond.
What percentage of college assaults involve alcohol?
The Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network (RAINN) found that in 50% of cases, the victim was under the influence of alcohol at the time of assault, and 63% of offenders were under the influence. Since alcohol is a primary variable affecting assault outcomes, students and parents can explore ways to approach alcohol use from a more informed space. For example, someone who is “black out” drunk- a phenomenon that is on the rise on college campuses- can appear to be fully sober, and yet will not remember the next day what they said or did the night before.
Alcohol is known to numb the senses, slow us down, and make it harder to access our red flag signals when danger is near. Helping college-aged young people explore their own relationship with alcohol in a judgement-free way, creates the likelihood for more discretionary thinking when the moment calls for it.
What all college freshmen need to know about the red zone
Half of all assaults involve victims between the ages of 18 and 34. Sexual assault on college campuses is more likely to occur with a young freshman who may be new to the type of drinking practices college is known for, and who is more apt to make false assumptions about others’ motives when life experience is limited.
Protecting students from sexual assault on campus requires conversations that build discretionary thinking, or the ability to recognize red flag signals.
While every young person is different, there are a few things that each has in common. Since the brain doesn’t develop fully until age 24 or 25, college students lack full use of the executive brain functioning. We can do a lot for young people by asking the kind of questions that help them connect with their intuition, or “gut instinct” before their brain development has caught up. These can include: “what does it feel like when someone is invading your space?” or “What would you say if someone were trying to manipulating you sexually?” or “What are the signs of a toxic relationship?” These types of inquiries help to build discretionary thinking and greater confidence in students who may be new to the college scene.
How to Prevent Sexual Assault on College Campus
Peer relationships and friendships are crucial to teens and young adults. We can support them in affirming the need for healthy, sustainable relationships, but also help them identify the exceptions, and what a plan could look like if a new relationship is not going as planned.
Since 80% of assaults occur with a known offender, one of the biggest obstacles to reporting is the fact that there is a relationship at stake. Having straightforward conversations about the signs to look for in a toxic relationship, such as control, manipulation or making of threats, will empower young people to develop trust in themselves and their ability to communicate their needs.
Even the resistant young person who would rather be doing a month’s worth of household laundry than having a discussion with you about sexual safety, will have in the back of their minds some of the facts you introduced. They will remember what it felt like when you asked the hard questions, and may think twice about how to respond in a moment of risk. Equipping young people with self-awareness as well as an understanding of the problem, is a crucial aspect of the college preparation process, a process that can begin at any stage of their college career.
If you’re concerned about your college-aged child’s sexual safety, please visit our website for more information and insight on how to arm young people against sexual violence. We are here to help. You can find us at https://www.bestrongbewise.com
